(Disclaimer: if you don’t watch True Blood, like, religiously, then you probably won’t get this post.)
No show gets me all tickled and excited like ‘True Blood.’ It is not just the acting, it’s the dialogue. It can be damn funny.
Last episode, Bill was talking about the history of vampires and alluded to the fact that the Spanish Inquisition was instigated by vampires against witches. He explained to his sheriffs saying, “Vampires have often found it advantageous to maintain a hidden presence in humanity’s most powerful institutions. In the 1600s, it was the Catholic church, and today, as you all know, it’s Google, Fox News.”
Another quote from Jason Stackhouse about vampires, “Maybe Jesus was the first vampire. Man, he rose from the dead too, and he told people, ‘Hey y’all, drink my blood, it’ll give you special powers’.”
Lafayette is another funny oneliner. When he reluctantly went to hang out with a coven of witchs, I actually decided this as my personal anthem “Five minutes, ten if they got drinks.”
One of my favorites quotes of all time is when Sookie, while missing Bill says, “I keep expecting him to come through that door and say, ‘Sookeeeeh!’ “
Another witty outburst from Sookie when Eric drained an entire fairy, she yelled, “you killed my fairy godmother!”
Watching True Blood with Turtle is also entertaining. During one scene where there was full nudity, he said, “oh, this show is becoming like soft porn! I like!”
When vampires die, it is one bloody explosive goo. When fairies die, they just fade into dust. So when Sookie’s grandfather died after leaving the fairy world, Turtle said, “so that’s how fairies die. No mess.”
I have to say, this is currently my favorite show (Breaking Bad is a very close second). It is strange, campy, southern, bloody, not for the squeamish and has clever scripting. I recommend it to anyone who has never seen an episode.