Americanized = Bad? Mechie onu!

27 Oct

Remember my first post about having two mistresses?  Correct me if I am wrong, but I think one of the worst things you can do to me to call me Americanized.  Especially if you do it while I am visiting naija.  I hate being called that cus it makes me feel like a sell-out and I over compensate.  I remember my last trip home for my sister’s traditional wedding.  I got up early everyday (odd, since I am sooooo not a morning person), did all the chores I could get my hands on, volunteered for more, did not eat until everyone had eaten.  In fact, I was the perfect daughter/sister/niece/cousin/relative/pest.  I knew people were watching me, waiting for a flaw so they could pounce and call me Americanized.  My father confirmed this  by calling me months later extolling my virtues and telling me how people were surprised that I was visiting from the U.S., how I had no false airs and graces, how I was very hard working and friendly, how no one could tell I was from America.  He said, “keep up being how you are.”  I was pissed.  Because to tell you the truth, while I put on my ‘perfection’ act, all I wanted was a cold giant Heineken and nkwobi at the nearest People’s Club. I wanted to cut loose and have fun, dance, flirt with guys, you know – act like it’s Saturday night in downtown Atlanta. Or Detroit.  But I was being watched. 42-18810358

Why are there negative attributes associated with Nigerians in America?  A few:

Aje Butter – loosely translated as weak or lazy

Fake Accent – ganna, havta, berra, somborri, twenny, meeeeeeen!  *all in a an octave higher than traditional naija vocals*

Flashy – need I say more?

Arrogant – again, need I say more

Critical – of all things Nigerian – NEPA, roads, transportation, congestion, bribery, lawlessness etc.

And when it comes to relationships here in the United States, it’s worse!  Men think all the ladies here are just rotten apples, women think all the men here don open eye (too smart for their own good).  If a woman can’t cook, she is too Americanized.  Try explaining that one to Rachel Ray or Martha ‘did I not ask for Merlot!’ Stewart.  If woman is not deferential enough she is too proud, like those white girls.  Tell that to Oprah.  If she wears an evening dress to a wedding instead of aso ebi, she is too proud to be African. If a man does not make enough money, he has gotten lazy and allowed the bad morals of this country to get to him.  If he does not have enough degrees, he is not making use of his potentials. If he has even ONE baby mama, e don spoil (he has gone bad). 

I am personally grateful for my Americanization.  Only when I accepted who I had become here, did I truly start enjoying my life instead of worrying about staying true to this so-called ideal as to what a true Nigerian in America is all about.  Although I won’t go out and burn my all my Ankara wear, I am done worrying about it.  Let people say what they want to say.

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9 Responses to “Americanized = Bad? Mechie onu!”

  1. Myne Whitman October 27, 2009 at 8:27 pm #

    You don vex finish ooo hahaha. What can I say. I am myself first before any in UK in America came. and that’s waht I’ll tell you, be yourself.

  2. ttlolla October 28, 2009 at 6:23 am #

    I get the same thing being from london, but i dint bother trying to impress them cos either way, they will still complain. so i just enjoyed my holiday to the mx

  3. bsnc October 28, 2009 at 10:38 pm #

    lol true story. let people say what they want, do you jare…

  4. Joicee October 30, 2009 at 9:44 am #

    Just be yourself…. life is too short to be spent worrying about what others think

    p.s I thought Aje butter meant when someone is being posh

  5. Rosie October 30, 2009 at 11:30 am #

    Myne: i need to vent once in a while or else I’ll go crazy. Its good that you guys understand.

    ttlolla: I wish I had your backbone, girl.

    bsnc: thank you jare

    joicee: think it means posh too to a degree but connotation seems to be weakling as opposed to ‘aje paki’

  6. tunrayo October 30, 2009 at 11:34 am #

    No matter what you do, you can never please anyone. just do you. period.

  7. GoodNaijaGirl November 5, 2009 at 12:51 am #

    I like your new attitude. In my opinion it should be possible for you to both be a helpful, respectful daughter/niece/cousin etc and also party and have a blast. So, when do you visit next, and show them the new you? 😉

  8. Rosie November 5, 2009 at 11:33 am #

    Tunrayo: thank you, I will so me from now on.

    GNG: it is possible but some haters will just want to say something just to say something.

  9. ronzyweezy February 2, 2012 at 1:10 am #

    Interesting

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