Suicides, Celebrities and Remittances

19 Dec

I apologize for my random musings and cryptic messages.  I have been in a weird place lately. I still am.  Hence the following negative post.

Firstly, it is Christmas.  I friggin’ hate Christmas. That’s my bah humbug post for the year.  I won’t beat a dead horse.

Secondly, I have found myself mildly irritated at some posts and comments I have read lately.  I have always been a fan of Nigerian lifestyle bloggers.  They help me unwind at the end of my day and keep track of what’s going on in a world I have since left.  Recent posts have me thinking that some blogs are becoming nothing more than news aggregations with no fact checking fail safes and with fewer well thought out commentaries on issues that we can relate to.  I see more PR related crap like, “Actress XYZ Acquires a New BMW,” or “Artiste 69 Buys New Home in Lagos,” or “H1N1 wears the same dress as Shakira.”

*eye roll*

I always quickly scroll down to the human interest stories about real people with real problems and political issues.  That is where the meat of juicy blogging is.  Otherwise, some of these blogs are endangered and will fall into online entertainment magazine world.

Any hue – while perusing a few posts,  some stories and comments rubbed me the wrong way.  Take for instance the disappearance of the Pharmacy Resident Tosin Oyewolo.  The title of the post made me believe that the young lady was dead from apparent suicide by jumping off a bridge in Canada but her body had not been found and the investigators have not confirmed anything.  Worse, a few boneheaded commenters had these to say about the alleged suicide:

“and u will go straight to hell! na ur probs pass ? av got no sympathy 4 u .jst lost an aunt whom her hubby gave hiv n bcos of it,she couldnt fite her cancer n she jst slipped away n u ar takin ur own life ? go dance alanta wit d devil” – Devour

Devour, may you get depressed, light yourself on fire and dance with the devil until you die.  How does it feel for someone who does not know you to pass judgment and condemn you to hellfire?  I have more choice words for you but the Christian in me fears that God will get pissed.  I have made my point.  (And no, I do not honestly wish you death).

“na wa oh. this is the problem of growing up abroad. Naija people no dey commit suicide. Na wa o” – Jobsfornaija

Dear Jobs, suicide does not discriminate against anyone nation.  It is an equal opportunity cause of death.

“Nkechi i quite understand where devour is coming from, no matter what situation she might have found herself in she has no right whatsoever to take the life she did not know how it was created. She couldnt even pity her loved ones, never considered the pain and emotional trauma they will face in her absence. Pls to everyone out there when u seem to be hopeless in life always remember that “There is always sunshine after rain, and everything gets better when you try again” Tosin rest in peace but you disappointed your loved ones, may God give them the fortitude to bear your loss” – Wini Syno Is Speaking

Dear Wini Syno, God gave us all free will.  Meaning we can choose to do whatever we want with ourselves in our life including the choice of ending it.  As a person who has been treated for depression and suicidal tendencies, I will never wish you to spend five minutes in that scary neighborhood called the depressed human mind.  Once you have been in there, you understand how death can be a really, really good option.  Think of it like being in the Sahara desert, armed bandits have just robbed you and lit you on fire.  There is no water to put out your fire even if a good Samaritan wanted to help.  Would you not beg the robbers to shoot you and put you out of your misery.  That is what human depression feels like.

“DAMN! NA WA O!!!!

This might be a bit off the topic, but couldn’t she find a more PEACEFUL WAY TO DIE?

she’s a PHARMACIST so im sure she could have administered herself some pills to pass away PEACEFULLY IN BED

instead of creating so much media drama and stress for her family, and in the end they find a BATTERED and ROTTING corpse. 😦

R.I.P I wish peace of mind as soon as possible” – So Much Drama Poor Family

Dear So Much Drama, I don’t think that when someone thinks of committing suicide they go up to an ASM (All Suicide Machine) and choose from a menu of options.  When the need to end it arises, you pick the quickest way out.  The jumper might have been driving on the bridge and decided, ‘hey, this spot looks great!’ I am sure if he/she was chilling at home and had a bottle full of medication, that could have been an option too.  I am sure the corpse will rot just as well.  Hey, maybe jumpers just want to feel the wind in their hair one last time before eternal darkness.  You watch too many movies.

…..and it goes on and on and on …

[Side Note: Although Devour has actually apologized for her comments, I still wrote about it to show how clouded our beliefs are about depression and suicide especially in Nigeria.]

My last rant for the day (I swear) is a post that said … according to Dr. Bright Okogu, the Nigerian Director-General of the Budget Office (or maybe her briefing was written by one of her numerous special assistants),  “To survive the harsh economic climate abroad, Nigerians now beg their relations at home to send money to them. This is what I have seen, this is what I have heard, and it is as bad as that.”

She goes on to say, “Because of the declining remittances from Nigerians in the diaspora, the DG Budget Office said the Nigerian economy would be badly affected, stressing that the growth of the economy largely depended on the informal sector.”

I seriously doubt that.  At least until our oil revenues dry up.


Yes.  I know, I know …  I am avoiding the elephant in the room.  I don’t want to talk about it yet.  At least until after Turtle and I get back from Rochester. And checks written to me start coming in my mail box.

Seasons Greetings Ya’ll!




4 Responses to “Suicides, Celebrities and Remittances”

  1. Ginger December 19, 2011 at 7:04 pm #

    Nigerians and their oh so strong sanctimonious views. What we don’t understand, we blanket it with religion. It would have been amusing if not for the fact that such views are dangerous.

    The hon minister might not be wrong. A lot of the masses do depend on foreign remmittances to augment their income. This then trickles down to extended kin. 40 dollars here, 100 dollars there can go a looooooooooong way in some homes.

  2. Beulah! December 19, 2011 at 10:09 pm #

    As Nigerians, we can be myopic and one-sided in our statements atimes. Depression is one ailment a lot of people over look in Nigeria but that doesn’t mean it doesn’t exist there. i feel so sad for Tosin’s family, has there been any recent news about her ?

    I haven’t been here in a while, so good to be back & hope the wedding plans are coming up well??

    Compliments of d season!

  3. Amy December 26, 2011 at 10:35 pm #

    I heard about Tosin when she first went missing but I did not know that her body has been found. Really such a sad story. I wish somehow she could have received the help she needed before she ended her life. I pray that she RIP and that her family can somehow find closure and solace.

  4. Joxy December 30, 2011 at 8:15 am #

    Very sad, didn’t know she had been found. A lot of people equate depression with being sad. Two totally different animals. May God help us all to be more understanding, and console all those left behind. Season’s greetings.

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